


One Foot on the Ground

by fits_in_frames



Category: Heroes (TV)
Genre: M/M, Porn Battle, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-06-11
Updated: 2009-06-11
Packaged: 2018-01-20 05:41:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1498750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fits_in_frames/pseuds/fits_in_frames
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And then, as if to prove a point, Nathan flies.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Foot on the Ground

**Author's Note:**

> _i never loved nobody fully_  
>  _always one foot on the ground_  
>  {regina spektor // fidelity}  
> 
> 
> Missing scene from "Six Months Ago"/"Villians". Written for Porn Battle VIII ([original comment](http://oxoniensis.dreamwidth.org/10575.html?thread=976719#t976719)).

Nathan knows that Peter envies him. Always envied him, for his whole life, because Nathan was older, bigger, smarter, stronger, shinier. He doubts that Peter knows exactly how much pressure he's under to be the perfect older brother, but it doesn't really matter because the proud grins on his kid brother's face tell him it doesn't.

Here's the thing: Nathan envies Peter, too. He envies the freedom Peter has, he envies the dreamer in him, he envies the endless hopefulness and the willingness to believe in absolutely everything and everyone. He knows that part of that is age difference--14 is very different from 26 plus a tour in Bosnia--but he's jealous all the same, and tries to capture some of that with every hug, every glance, every moment they're together. It's even part of the reason he now sleeps with Peter sometimes--because every time Peter touches him (careful and lithe or rough and needy, all the same), he feels a little lighter, like a weight's been lifted off his chest. He knows Peter wants it-- _needs_ it--so he does it without ever mentioning that when they're all tangled up, anything is possible.

And then, as if to prove a point, Nathan flies.

*

He's not even sure it really happened, but he keeps playing the accident over and over in his head at the hospital while he waits for his family to show up, and he keeps remembering it exactly the same way: _he flew_. He'd imagined it, dreamed it many times--what kid hadn't?--but it didn't feel the same: he wasn't weightless, or more graceful or agile, just _up_. He's grateful when Peter shows up first, both because he can stop thinking about--whatever the hell it is that just happened, and because he doesn't know if he could handle Mom and Dad without him. As it is, he threatens his father's life before finally going in to see Heidi. She's barely awake and tells him through a haze of painkillers that she can't feel anything below her waist. He strokes her hair and tells her it'll be okay. He doesn't believe it himself, but she's asleep again so it doesn't matter. Peter's waiting for him when he comes out.

"They're moving her to a room," he says.

"Yeah," Nathan says, because it feels wrong to say nothing.

Peter hesitates. "And they said that once they do, you should go home."

He looks up. "No," he says, shaking his head, "no, I--"

Peter grabs his elbow as he starts to turn away. "At the very least, you need to lie down." He's trying to make eye contact, and failing miserably. "Nathan, you need some rest."

"I want to be here when she wakes up," he says without thinking. He knows at this point he's making excuses, but he's not really sure why.

"Mom's staying with her," Peter says, crooking his eyebrows with concern. Nathan starts to ask _wiil you come with me_ , but Peter answers him with a tilt of the head and a tug on his elbow: "C'mon, I'll call us a cab."

(Peter holds his hand on the taxi ride, and he very nearly tells him the truth. He settles for not batting him away like he normally would, and biting his tongue.)

*

It's nearly dawn when they get home. He checks on the boys (they're sleeping, oblivious) and leaves a note for the nanny to get the kids out to school, for when she wakes up. Peter's turning back the covers on the bed in the guest room when he walks in. "Hey."

"Hey," Peter says, and starts walking towards him. "Lemme see your head." He reaches up and lifts the corner of the bandage from his forehead, studies the wound with trained eyes. "I need to change this."

"I'm fine, Pete," he says, turning away, but Peter gently pulls him back.

"C'mon, the only reason they let you go home is because I was going to be with you. Now let me change this before you get an infection." Peter sounds like a goddamn grownup all of a sudden, and Nathan wonders when the hell that happened.

Peter leads him into the bathroom across the hall, sits him down, and goes into nurse mode, pausing only to say _this might sting_ before dabbing at him with wet cotton. Nathan just stares at the floor, wincing a little when it does sting, and purses his mouth shut so he doesn't start up about how he can fly and get sent back to the hospital for entirely different reasons.

"Hey," Peter says as he positions the last piece of medical tape. "Nathan."

Nathan looks up.

"It's gonna be okay."

He makes an incredulous noise. "No, it's not, Peter, she--"

"She's alive, that's all that matters," Peter says, and that's the end of the conversation.

Peter starts walking out as Nathan stands up, chest suddenly tight, and says, "I'm sleeping in the guest room tonight." Peter turns back, and Nathan continues. "I just can't--"

"Okay," Peter says. "I'll go downstairs, then."

Nathan catches his arm before he gets very far into the hallway. The word _no_ barely falls from his lips, but Peter just nods and lets Nathan follow him into the bedroom.

They undress on opposite sides of the bed, facing away from each other, like married couples in movies, down to their briefs and undershirts and socks. Nathan gets under the covers first, curls in on himself, and then Peter turns off the bedside lamp and comes up behind him, sliding a warm hand around his side. He turns over to face Peter, and Peter runs a hand through his hair, thumb lingering on the bandage, leans forward and kisses the side of his nose.

"It's okay," he murmurs against Nathan's cheekbone. He moves his hand down to Nathan's jaw, curls his fingers slightly, and kisses him. Nathan barely kisses back, both knowing he wants this, and knowing--

"We shouldn't do this," he whispers against Peter's lips.

Peter rolls away slightly. "I can stop if you--"

"No," he says quickly, reaching up to brush Peter's hair out of his eyes, wetting his lips. "No." So Peter comes back, Nathan's hand resting on his cheek, and then they're kissing again: soft and slow and tentative at first, then deep but gentle as Peter's hand moves down to Nathan's neck, to his chest, then needy and mouthy and borderline frantic, Nathan grabbing the back of Peter's head and forcing them together.

Peter's bottom hand comes up and starts absently stroking Nathan's hair, his forehead, his eyebrow; the other moves down to palm him through a thin layer of cotton. He gets one leg up over both of Peter's, wraps an arm around his back, pulls him in and presses their bodies together, half-sighing and half-moaning into his mouth. Peter ruts up against his thigh a little, and slips his hand under the waistband of his briefs. He rests it there as he pulls away from Nathan's mouth with a little nip to his bottom lip. They just look at each other for a moment, panting.

Peter starts: "Do you--"

"Yes," Nathan cuts him off, and decides to leave out the _oh dear god_ beforehand.

Peter kisses his mouth one more time, then moves to his chin and his neck, and curls his fingers around Nathan's cock, not moving, just letting him feel the light pressure of his touch. He sighs audibly and grabs fistfuls of Peter's hair in both his hands. Peter's thumb starts moving in little circles around the head, then his whole hand starts stroking the shaft, all while still kissing and licking and nipping gently at his neck and collarbone and--

"God, Peter," he gasps, "God."

Peter's other hand is on his chest, and that's what he concentrates on when his hips hitch and he comes a minute later: not the Linderman case, not the accident, not Heidi, not even the fact that he can fucking _fly_ \--just Peter's hand, steady and calm over his heart. It's comforting as he recovers, and that feeling doesn't go away until Peter does. He's out of the bed and gathering up his clothes before Nathan can catch his breath, and by the time he does, Peter's halfway to the door.

"Pete," he says, propping himself up on his elbow to half-sitting.

Peter turns around. "I'm gonna sleep downstairs. You need to get some rest."

He's obviously still hard--Nathan can see it in silhouette against the dawnlight streaming in, so he says, "At least let me--"

"I'll be fine," Peter says with a self-depreciating smirk in his voice. "I'm a big boy."

Nathan doesn't respond, and Peter doesn't move; they just listen to each other breathe for a moment.

"It's gonna be okay, Nathan," Peter finally says, and Nathan half-believes him, and that makes him brave. Peter starts to walk away when Nathan calls him back again. The reflexive _yeah_ that comes out of Peter's mouth sounds slightly more annoyed than usual, but Nathan ignores it.

"If I--if I told you something crazy, would you believe me?"

Peter shifts his weight. "Depends on how crazy."

"If I--" he pauses, pretends to think of the most insane thing he might ever say, and says it that way "--told you I could fly. Would you believe me?"

"I don't know," Peter says with a little edge of sarcasm in his voice that makes Nathan rethink saying anything at all. Then, as if to confirm this: "You trying to tell me you can fly, Nathan?"

"What? No," he says defensively, hoping Peter doesn't see through him. "That was just an example. I mean, that level of crazy."

"I might." A pause, then a little stutter that means _i don't want to sound stupid in front of you_ : "I--I might. Probably."

He nods even though he knows Peter can barely see him.

"You have something to tell me, or...?"

"No," he lies, and that's that. He doesn't expect Peter pace back over, except that that's exactly what he does.

He leans in as close as he can with his clothes balled up against his stomach and says, "It's gonna be okay."

Nathan nearly tells him, right there (even after lying so blatantly, Peter would forgive him) but he's close enough that he can grab the back of Peter's neck and pull him into one last, lingering kiss to swallow it up instead. "Love you," he whispers and when he opens his eyes, Peter's gone.

He falls asleep a few minutes later. He doesn't dream, and he's half-disappointed when he wakes up.

*

(When Peter tells him, months later, that he thinks he can fly, it takes half his strength and an arm around his shoulders to not to say _no you idiot,_ I'm _the one that does that_ , and to admit he's jealous because if their places were reversed, this is not the conversation they would be having. He decides Peter's hurt feelings are punishment enough, and doesn't think of it again.)


End file.
